


snow fairy

by mqry



Series: one decision away [2]
Category: Fairy Tail
Genre: Angst, Break Up, F/M, Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-27
Updated: 2019-08-27
Packaged: 2020-09-28 00:42:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,554
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20417051
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mqry/pseuds/mqry
Summary: the snow fell down around them with a sense of brokenness that echoed between the two. natsu didn't understand why everything that they had been through was broken by something so - so seemingly small and trival and even after everything why lucy still couldn't look him in the eye.the one where lucy and natsu hit a bump in the roadpsa: lowercase intended





	snow fairy

**Author's Note:**

> Note: natsu and lucy are already currently dating. natsu doesn't realize it yet but lucy has some mixed feelings about their relationship.
> 
> lowercase intended!

lucy told him to meet her underneath the sakura tree that evening. it was unlike her to use such a strict tone, with an aura of - well, of _something_ around her. natsu was confused, at first. he didn’t know what she wanted, and why she seemed so technical about this specific meeting.  
  
but it was never good to keep lucy waiting. he'd realized that in the short time that they'd been together; it was that she never wanted to kept waiting long if it was something important. and by the tone of her voice, it was something important.  
  
the two of them had just returned from a job when lucy gave him the message. he had originally dismissed it, itching to start another fight with gray or erza. lucy had given him a gentle smile, and then left the guild.  
  
he'd been fighting with gray, so the message had somehow slipped out his mind. and after all the excitement had passed, happy had to remind him that lucy had asked his presence.  
  
it's then when he starts to think why lucy wanted to meet him. happy is sucking on a piece of fish, sitting contently on top of a table and facing natsu.  
  
"natsu?" he asks, his voice muffled. "what's wrong?"  
  
he shrugs. "lucy sounded serious when she said she wanted to see me, don't you think?"  
  
happy just smirks, though, unbothered. "she's probably just mad at you for some boyfriend thing. what did you do, natsu?"  
  
natsu frowns at him, narrowing his eyes at happy. "i didn't do anything! i think..." he says defensively, but happy just laughs.  
  
"maybe. but i can't help to think - i don't know, maybe it is just some boyfriend thing," natsu says, but he still has an uneasy feeling in his stomach.  
  
erza, who was sitting near her usual place by the bar, seems to notice natsu's unease from where he's sitting, and when he looks up, he sees her looking down at him.  
  
"what's wrong, natsu? trouble with lucy?" she questions, with no malice behind her words. he nods.  
  
"yeah. do you think i might've done something wrong?" he implores, and erza crosses her arms.  
  
"i don't think you would be so reckless," she says, a light smile ghosting her features. "lucy might just be having an off day. i'm sure it's nothing that the two of you spending time together won't fix."  
  
natsu seems to ponder this, and a confused expression crosses his face. gray supposedly overhears the exchange, and pokes his head in.  
  
"jeez, natsu, you've upset lucy again? what kind of shitty boyfriend move did you do this time?" he remarks snarkily and natsu's teeth grit together. erza glowers at him, however, and gray quickly apologizes.  
  
"well, at least bring flowers," he says, raising a brow. natsu turns his nose up at him.  
  
"shut up, gray."

  
-  
  
it's only 5 when the sun starts to go down, an effect most likely caused by the winter season. natsu worries that lucy might catch a cold if she's out waiting for him, so he decides to show up early. that way, he could get her somewhere warm quickly if it started to snow.  
  
he's a little surprised because lucy's not there when he shows. lucy's always early if it's something important. the fact that she's not there yet makes him feel a bit at ease and he lets out a small sigh of relief. it must not be that important, after all. happy follows excitedly after him.  
  
when he reaches the trunk of the tree, he sighs and sits at the base of it. happy rests against him, dropping his aera magic. in his hand is a bouquet of flowers, which after a bit of consideration, he decides probably wasn't a bad idea after all.  
  
"do you think lucy will bring any fish for me when she comes?" happy asks, and natsu shrugs.  
  
"i don't know. if she doesn't, we can go fishing after," natsu offers, and happy buzzes, satisfied.

he looks up at the tree, then. it's branches were bare now. when they bloomed, they looked beautiful. magnolia had rainbow sakuras, and lucy had always loved to look at them. he remembers her first hanami, and the despair she felt when she could not be there for it because of a cold.  
  
him and happy had pulled a tree out from its roots for her, and it had resulted in the master giving them hell the next day. her smile in the morning had been worth it, and natsu would dig out a thousand sakuras if it meant that she would have that smile on her face forever.  
  
when they had first gotten together, it was new and something strange for him. he never really had any strong feelings for anybody in a romantic way, except for possibly lisanna, and he didn't know how to always act accordingly.  
  
he knew that he cared for lucy very much, and he knew that he wanted to protect her in any way he could. but something told him that though he wanted the same thing for someone like erza, the feelings he had for lucy were different. and it was difficult for him to figure out how to effectively cope with his feelings and how to work them out with lucy.

and it seemed that it was the same for lucy. though she seemed to have a better understanding of how to work and communicate with natsu, the feelings that she felt were new to her too. she said before that she'd never had a boyfriend before, so it was something that the both of them were working out along the way.  
  
it was still awkward sometimes, when natsu wasn't able to say the right things, or how he still struggled with still fully understanding how to really show his emotions and explain how much he cared for lucy. but he tried as much as he could, and he hoped that she knew how much he loved her.  
  
he did love her, and though he still might not have the whole "dating" thing figured out, he knew that there was no other way to describe his feelings for her.  
  
he appreciated how patient she seemed to be with him when it came to his feelings. he knew that it probably was frustrating for her at times, but it meant so much to him. it was probably one of the reasons why it made him fall in love.  
  
he looks away from the tree then, and see the outline of a figure walking towards the tree. as it gets closer, he notices that the figure belongs to a woman, and it doesn't take long for natsu to recongize that it's lucy.  
  
"oi! lucy!" he calls out, raising his hand high. he holds onto the bouquet he bought, and he stands up. happy stands beside him, jumping up and down.  
  
"hey, natsu!" she answers, getting closer to him. he reaches in to kiss her, but she seems to pull away. lucy dodges his stare and opts to hug him instead. natsu is confused, and he wonders if it's another boyfriend/dating thing that he's messed up. when they seperate, natsu offers her the bouquet.  
  
"i got these for you!" he says hurriedly, and he rubs the back of his neck sheepishly.  
  
"oh, natsu, they're beautiful!" she starts, reaching for the bouquet, and her eyes shine before she stops herself. she pulls her hand back with a sharp breath. "i - i can't accept them..."  
  
natsu knits his brows together. "what's wrong, luce? are you okay?" he says, offering his hand to her. lucy has on a meloncholy look on her face. she rubs her arm awkwardly.  
  
"natsu, i wanted to talk to you about something," she says instead, and natsu nods.  
  
"yeah! whatever it is, i'll listen!" natsu says enthusiastically. lucy gives him a small smile. lucy had mentioned before that, in a relationship, both parties could talk about whatever they were feeling, with the confidence that somebody was listening and the relief that nobody was judging them.  
  
her smile fades away, though, and she looks away. there's something written behind her eyes, and natsu wonders what it is. she looks - extremely sad, and almost _regretful_ and afraid. about what - natsu wonders. what could it be that she wanted to tell him?  
  
"hey, lucy -" natsu begins. he takes her hand in his (absentmindedly forgetting that she never took his the first time) and he looks determinedly into her eyes. "- it's alright. whatever it is, i know that we'll figure it out, right? we always do. because we're lucy and natsu! and... i know that i'm not always the best with saying how i feel, but i know that it's okay when i'm with you. because you're - patient with me, and you know how to help me - and that makes us stronger.  
  
"you told me that i'm supposed to listen to you, and that you're supposed to be confident that i'm listening and that i'm not judging you. and you've always done that for me, and i will do the same for you. i know we've been dating for a while and i'm _still_ trying to get the hang of this whole dating thing, but i'm willing to get better at it. for you, lucy, because -  
  
"- because i love you. and i know that we never really said that before, but it's true, and it might be a whole new thing that we still have to figure out but - i know i want to do that with you, lucy."

he breathes a bit more easily after he says it. it takes a lot out of him to say it so clearly, and to say it so honestly to her, but he's still confident that she's listening, and he knows that she won't ever judge him for what he's saying. he knows that she'll still love him, and he knows that even if she's worried about whatever it is that she has to say, he'll be with her. in fairy tail, and whatever comes their way.  
  
it starts to snow then, soft flakes that land in lucy's hair. he thinks to himself that if there ever was a thing such as a snow fairy, it would look exactly like lucy.

"natsu..." she says. her bangs fall in front of her face, covering her eyes. they seem to darken slightly, and she begins to shake after hearing his words. lucy pulls her hands back to her side, almost - _tearing_ them from natsu's hold. she takes a deep breath to compose herself, then looks up at natsu.  
  
"i'm breaking up with you," lucy utters those words, those damned words that echo into his head, and he feels his eyes widen and his brain begin to pound. his heart starts to sink, and yet - he still struggles to understand.  
  
"breaking up with me?" he repeats, his mind failing to register those words, and what they mean. but as soon as they leave his mouth, something feels different. once so confident in lucy's understanding and gentle words, he now feels embarrased and almost ashamed to ask her what she means.  
  
lucy doesn't laugh at him, though. she only looks up at him patiently and studies him quietly. "yes," she replies. "meaning - i want us to stop dating."  
  
natsu feels a bit bare then, almost like he's a fish caught on a hook, and he doesn't know what to say. it - it hurts, when he finally realizes what lucy means. she doesn't -  
  
she doesn't want him to listen to her anymore, doesn't want him to share her thoughts and she doesn't want him to hold him at night the way he used to. she doesn't want him to kiss her the way he always did, always filled with love and tenderness. and she doesn't want him to hug her gently and warmly, the way he did whenever he saw that she felt down. it meant she didn't want to hear his long, tiresome attempts of him explaining how he felt anymore, those _pathetic_ times when he opened himself to her because he was a _stupid_ boy in love who would _never_ be worthy of loving her again -  
  
and then he takes a breath. and it's okay, for a second, and for a second he can think clearly.  
  
because before lucy was anything else, she was his friend. she was his partner, his teammate, and -  
  
she was part of fairy tail. she -  
  
"i'm sorry," she says quickly. too quickly, natsu thinks, and it's unlike her but then she says it again - "i'm sorry."  
  
natsu can’t think of anything to say, and he feels like lucy wants to speak, and he stays silent.  
  
"it's not - it's not -" she wants to say, but something stops her and it's almost like she's trying to choke the words out. and natsu wants to hold her close, run his fingers through her hair, and tell her that it's alright, but -  
  
\- but she said she didn't want that anymore -  
  
\- so. so he doesn't. instead he stays stoic, lets his hair fall over his eyes, and cover the tops of his face. so he takes a deep breath. "lucy. what do you want to say?"  
  
lucy takes a sharp breath, and she seems to push the lump in her throat away. "i want to say that i - i'm not ready. for this. for us. i can't be with you, because it makes me feel - wrong. because you don't deserve to get dragged down when i'm not giving you everything that i should.  
  
"and i'm - i'm sorry. because i didn't mean for this to get this far, or for this to ever end up like this and i'm sorry because i know that you love me, and you're trying your hardest to give me your all, and i'm taking it and throwing it all away. so - i'm sorry."  
  
she doesn't say anything more, and she doesn't seem to be satisfied with it, but there's nothing that natsu can say to comfort her because - she doesn't want it anymore.  
  
but when he tries to open his mouth, lucy stops him. "_don't_, natsu. i've made up my mind. i'm - sorry." she takes another breath then, and then turns away from him. and she walks away.  
  
he doesn't notice that he's been frozen stiff until this moment, this one moment, where it seems like he has the power to change it all, the one chance that he can finally make it all right again. and he realizes that he's never wanted anything more.  
  
so he shouts out to her. "_lucy_!" he screams out. she halts in her path, and gives a sideways glance to him.  
  
this is it. this is what it all comes down to.  
  
"you said you're not ready. then i'll wait until you are. i'll wait for you, lucy!"

lucy seemed to smile, even from far away.  
  
"natsu." she whispered, and from so far away, it seemed her walk broke into a run.  
  
the snow fell down around them with a sense of brokenness that echoed between the two. natsu stared after her, and took a small breath.  
  
he fell back onto the tree, his head hitting the trunk of the tree. he closed his eyes.  
  
"i'll wait."

**Author's Note:**

> Hey, thanks for reading! If you enjoyed this, leave a comment and a kudos below! They make my day <3
> 
> PSA: In case you haven't realized, I'm writing this series non-chronologically! So if things are getting confusing, just know that the little gaps and holes will be filled soon! :)


End file.
